An Empty Mind Lands Me in the Dog House: Thursday 10th March

I had a lovely moment on the train this morning. I was just pulling out my book, and trying to avoid glares that burned brighter than a thousand suns, when everything that I have leant so far in Japanese jumped out of my head. This is probably directly correlated to the fact that I have a conversation exam tomorrow, the rest of the day was thus spent vehemently trying to convince myself that I was able to say ‘I put the rubber in my mouth because I thought it was a chocolate’, and ‘No I have absolutely no intention of going outside and playing today’; it is fair to say that I am fairly nervous about tomorrow. I just keep having flashbacks to my GSCE German conversation exam which I sat in utter terror, whilst a single goblet of sweat escaped the attentions of my antiperspirant and slowly worked its way down the inside of my shirt. If tomorrow’s weather allows it, I am not ruling out the possibility of a tank top.

And all hell followed with him…

Whilst the craze for treating pets like a long lost love is by no means confined to Japan, they seem to take things to another level over here. Many a time have I been walking past a pram, only to discover that it contains a miniature Poodle, Chihuahua, or in one instance what looked like an Alsatian! It also seems that the more pampered these pets are, the worse they behave. This may well turn out to be entirely my fault, but dogs in jumpers just do not seem to like me. This evening as I nipped into the Lawson’s ¥100 shop, I spotted one such beast and attempted to approach. The minute he saw me he started barking his head off, and seemed to be in real danger of strangling himself, such was the consternation that I appeared to be causing this poor creature. I managed to take get a quick picture of him before I beat a hasty retreat, with the (legally required) shutter noise of my iPhone causing the pitiable brute even more annoyance, not to mention drawing a few more looks from the assembling crowds. Rather disturbingly I spent the walk home trying to construct the sentence ‘If the dog bit me I would not be happy, and it would be his fault.’

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About truehamlet

Sam is a senior lecturer in Science Communication, who researches the different ways in which media such as poetry and film can be used to communicate science to new audiences.
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